I just read something.
Something that I think I should read, but rather I had not.

I know for sure I'll never give this up. Not for anything in this world.
But to be truthful, I've never liked to face people who've already had negative impressions/prejudice towards me for whatever reason. If I never knew, perhaps I could behave naturally and change their perception along the way. But if I know, I probably will be too scared to even try in the first place. Yes, humji ttm but I'm just like that. And now I'll never know when I'll ever dare to take this first step.
Then again, who isn't like that right, unless you're A: 100% self-confident, B: 100% arrogant C: mentally exceptionally strong or perhaps most ideally, D: Believes in yourself, A LOT

Honestly, I did wonder if I played a part in this, and I struggled a night to get over it, eventually succeeding cos I believe we're all sensible and have tried our best, no? I understand where you're coming from, but I hope you won't be too quick to judge.

I no longer feel as disturbed as I did that night cos I've calmed down and thought those words through. NO, you won't get me down this lightly, but as of now, I'm really not emotionally strong enough, nor courageous enough to fight your perception.

With everything that's bugging me, tonight's really a tough night.

squeaked.
7:34 PM
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